When you love someone in a rational, genuine way, you love that person as an individual. You sincerely want him or her to be happy, and you want to add to their life while, at the same time, experiencing your own enjoyment of that person.
Psychology & Living
“Moneyball” and the Source of Values
“Moneyball” is a baseball movie that isn’t about baseball. It is a movie about the passionate pursuit of values. And more fundamentally, it is a movie about the source of value creation—the rational, independent judgment of innovators. Starring Brad Pitt as Billy...
Coping with Interruptions
By some estimates, people lose 2 hours of work a day due to interruptions. The time is wasted in two ways: First, when you are interrupted, you often lose your place. You have to go back and redo some of the work to restore your working context. Second, the topic of...
The Pomodoro Technique: How a Kitchen Timer Can Help You Get More Done
When people complain about not getting things done, they almost always wish they had bigger blocks of time to do the work. A surprising solution to this problem is to plan your unstructured time using standard time blocks of 25 minutes. The method, called the Pomodoro...
How a Decision Log Can Help You Move from Scattered to Streamlined
Don't be embarrassed if you occasionally feel scattered. It's a normal transition state. For example, after you've finished a major project, you may feel somewhat scattered until you've figured out the next big thing to focus on. But don't let yourself remain...
Achieve Your Lifetime Goals by Thinking About Them Every Year
"Change your smoke detector batteries when you change the clocks to or from Daylight Savings Time. Otherwise you'll forget." This little trick suggests a way to help you achieve some of the most important goals you'll ever set: your lifetime goals. Your lifetime goals...
The Secret to Doing Better Next Time
Did something go badly? A "discussion" with a spouse or coworker that ended in acrimony? A proposal that flopped? When something goes badly, you may be tempted to forget about it and just try to do better next time. But the secret to doing better lies in thinking more...
The Unfounded Assumption that Can Stop Logical Thinking in Its Tracks
Join me in the campaign to eliminate prejudice against messy thinking tactics. Floating in the back of many people's minds is the idea that "logical" means "neat." People sometimes hesitate to make a list unless they can write down the items in their proper order....
?Three Tips for Using Small Time Blocks for an Open-Ended Thinking Task
When you have a big question to think about, don't wait until you have 2 or 3 hours free to tackle it. There just aren't enough big blocks of time available to make that a practical strategy. Instead, I learn how to Velcro together smaller blocks of time--say 25...
It’s the Electronic Age, But Don’t Forget Paper-Age Lessons
Here's some old-fashioned advice that may be just what you need to get out of a present-day thinking block: Spread out your notes all over your desk. That's right, your desk, not your computer screen. Yes, programs exist to move around words in many wonderful easy...
Don't Let Pressure Sabotage Your Thinking
Pressure can sabotage your thinking. By pressure, I mean an issue weighing on your mind as you try to concentrate on something else. Perhaps it's an imminent deadline or a desperate desire to do a fantastic job. Maybe it's a highly-charged emotional situation you...
Playing Two Thinking Roles Can Ignite Your Thinking
Here's a surprisingly effective technique that can pry information loose from your brain and ignite your thinking when you're stalled: The "Q&A Technique." [1] Here's the technique: Write down a question you are puzzling over. ("How" and "Why"...
Stuck in a Pattern? Break Out with an Experiment
It's easy to fall into a counterproductive pattern. Perhaps you often check email before settling down to work--and then reading the email wipes out your morning work time. Or three days in a row you put off an important call until the afternoon--then forget to make...
Find Yourself Digressing? Take a Quick Timeout
It happens to the best of us. You sit down to work on your top project, but soon you find yourself thinking about how to respond to a contentious email. Or after a solid hour's work, you step out for a quick break and get waylaid by a co-worker who "just needs five...
The Joy of Football
As half the nation eagerly awaits the kickoff of the Super Bowl, the other half looks on in wonderment at what could be so enthralling about grown men running up and down a field carrying an oblong ball. Football fans who cannot articulate why they feel such passion...
Three Good Things
Here's a daily practice I learned from Martin Seligman, author of Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness. Once each day, write down three good things that happened in the last 24 hours. You can write them before going to bed or first thing in the morning. You can...
What to Resolve This New Year
This New Year’s, resolve to think about how to make your life better, not just once a year, but every day.
What is the Meaning of New Year’s?
New Year’s Day is the most active-minded holiday, because it is the one where people evaluate their lives and plan and resolve to take action.
TJ Walker’s Secret to Foolproof Presentations
Many books offer great advice. Some are so powerful they change your mind on issues you consider settled. Very few are so clear you can learn something about thinking just by reading them. TJ Walker's Secret to Foolproof Presentations is all three. At first...
Aiding Willpower
I think willpower draws on a kind of reservoir of emotional energy. Because it is so important to be able to call on willpower when I need it, I do several things to conserve that energy by reducing how often I need willpower: 1) I schedule my activity so it matches...
Three Good Things
Here's a daily practice I learned from Martin Seligman, author of Learned Optimism and Authentic Happiness. Once each day, write down three good things that happened in the last 24 hours. You can write them before going to bed or first thing in the morning. You can...
Setting Standing Orders
I'm a believer in using checklists and notes as memory aids. But sometimes you need to be able to rely on your own memory. This is particularly true for things you want to remember every time, like: Remember the car keys. Pronounce that word PREF-ur-u-buul, not...
The New Rational Manager
In the 1960's, Charles Kepner and Benjamin Tregoe translated a few key logical processes into simple, practical, teachable procedures. Since then, their methods have helped three generations of managers solve problems and make decisions at work. Their book, The New...
Dr. Jack Kevorkian and The Right to Assisted Suicide
If you have a duty to go on living, despite your better judgment, then your life does not belong to you, and you exist by permission, not by right.
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